In re “Orion’s New Leash on Life,” I very much understand how you must feel about the edits–ack! But at the same time, you’ve had a story published, which is a remarkable thing in and of itself, and worthy of celebration. I’d hate for you to lose sight of just how freaking cool that is, in and of itself, in the midst of this other stuff.

Thank you sweetheart. Honestly, I can’t even celebrate at all. I felt a lot of shame and embarrassment about the topic (pup) and it took me months to feel any pride in it. That only came after a shit ton of editing, since it was first rejected due to all the errors and then only accepted cause someone dropped out. Sooo many errors, I was so happy to smite them all. Or not.

Eddie Izzard once said if you’re a woman and you trip in heels, you’ll be embarrassed, but if a bloke trips in heels, he has to kill himself. I think my pride is wounded more so because I took a risk on a not well understood niche of BDSM lifestyles and the risk did not pay off. Someone on Goodreads gave it 2 out of 5 stars, too. Also, my Tumblr readers do not seem to care for my publications – those posts get very very few likes/reblogs compared to my normal captions. I don’t get why. So now I’m embarrassed too cause I hyped it up to an uninterested crowd and now I gotta retract it all.

And that said, my self esteem is very fragile cause I’m trying to climb out of depression. Every time I see my Tumblr inbox envelope light up I assume it’s something negative. I was really hoping Orion was gonna get good reception, but nope. I also could have used the money from good sales, but nope. Just another nope in a line of nopes.

The cover is awesome though.


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