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“Please stop. If we try to have a conversation I’m going to cry.”
I swallowed hard. I reach out for his hand after a moment he takes it, and squeezes it so hard it hurts.
“Brendan…” I began.
“What?” He asks, his voice high and tight. “Just let me suffer. I know once you get on the plane it will be easier. I’ll cry later.” Brendan brushed away a few tears and I pretended not to notice.
“Brendan,” I repeated. “I just made a new decision.”
Brendan raises his head a little. His cheeks are red. “What?”
“We decided it was the mature responsible thing to break clean when I went off to Harvard and you went to the Coast Guard. We lasted two years out of high school together, working and saving….planning for our own futures, but at the same time, self destructing.“ Brendan let’s out a sob. People are staring. I pull him into a hug. He clings to me like a magnet. “But I just cannot let you go. I will wait you for you, Brendan. That’s what I decided.”
My boyfriend is crying too hard to respond. I find myself unable to hold back any longer.
“And if you meet some guy and have hot helicopter sex-”
That gets a laugh.
“Then you enjoy it ok? Don’t waste a hot chance on me. Just tell me straight after ok?”
“No no no,” Brendan finally says. “I will wait for you. I will wait, and I will pine, because I love you so fucking much.”
I hiccup and feel silly. “You’re going to pine for me?”
“Awww…Brendan. I love how sweet you are. Shit, there is no way I could ever stop loving you.”

I know for a fact people are watching now. The announcement comes over the speaker: Flight 8498 to Boston now boarding at gate 34b…“
“That’s me,” I said softly.
“No,” Brendan whimpers.
I tilt his head and kiss him. “The waiting starts now. I will call when I land.”

I cant actually remember how I found the strength to remove Brendan’s warm body wrapped around with mine, or how I could get on that plane with that face watching me. All I know is, when I landed in Boston, I was still in tears.

Text is fictional.


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