“Excuse me, do you know where I can find an alpha male to use my body hard and fuck me dry as he pleases? My GPS isn’t connecting for some reason, I think I’m outside my data plan.”
“Oh, you went a couple blocks too far. If you just go up to Classen Boulevard and turn left, about two streets down on the corner there’s a gay bar. There’s a muscular guy that hangs out around down there who puts faggots in there place, if that’s what you want.”
“Ah fantastic, that’s what I need. So I go out to Classen this way?”
“Yeah that way, and make a left.”
“Thanks, man, appreciate it!”
“No problem, boy, hope you get the fucking you need.”
“No doubt about it! God, the hospitality in this city is amazing…”

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Text is fictional. Source unknown.