Posts I guess


Who needs a boyfriend when your cat is super clingy?

The party swirled around us. Beers crack open like wood snapping in a fire. Music drifts through the background, running off someone’s iPod. The acrid scent of weed fogs the air. Someone had nudged the basement window open which did nothing to alleviate the smells of college kids having a party on a humid Saturday night.
Jacob had been sitting next to me for a while. More than a while. Like maybe-he’s-doing-this-on-purpose for a while. When I drank my beer, he got us both new ones. We’d been talking to each-other and ignoring everyone else. Complaining about our chemistry homework. Our room-mates.
His crazy hovering mother.

The shit this poor house had been through. But also, our goals and dreams. Our prospects. Our futures. I felt like I could talk to him forever. I hated that I had to pee. 

I came back from the bathroom to find the house cat had jumped up on the cushions, but Jacob had saved my spot on the sofa. I settled in with beer number three and some pretzels from the snack table. I also brought some cocktail-sized hotdogs and we ate them together. It felt like we were spectators and this party was a sporting event. We noticed Allison flirting with Aaron and him totally missing it. Eventually Jacob hollered with alcohol-induced boldness, “Hey Aaron! She is trying to tell you she likes you, will you pay a fucking attention? No one else is gonna show you tits like that!”
I thought it was hilarious. I almost had to pee again.
That of course though, led to the topic of dating and partners. He asked if I had a girlfriend. I told him I wasn’t into girls. There was a long pause. He said, ‘Oh’. I waited for him to get up. He didn’t. I ate another pretzel and tried to figure out the expression on his face.
“Do you?”
“Do I what?”
“Have a girlfriend.”
There was a long pause. It was long. “…Jacob?” I asked.
“Sorry,” Jacob answered. He was absentmindedly petting the cat curled up next to his leg. “I just noticed Allison and Aaron are gone.”
I looked around. “Good for them.” We high-fived and went back to eating. “But seriously, do you have a girlfriend?”
“…I’m uh, not into girls really either. I’ve been noticing, at least.”

“Oh,” I said. I cringed at how surprised I sounded. “Oh ok.” I suddenly became aware of how drunk I was becoming.
There was more silence. I missed the banter. “So uh, Jacob. Do you want to try uh, going out sometime? Or just hanging out sometime, if that’s too much?”
Jacob stared a hole into where three other people were drawing mustaches and horns on an out-dated poster of a model hanging on the wall.
“Well,” he said, as if remembering he was in the middle of a conversation. “You are going to have to fight for my affections for another lady, you know.”
I raised an eyebrow. “…Lady? But I thought you said…”
Jacob pointed to the cat. “Madge is very clingy and does not like it when I come home smelling like other people.”
I laughed. “Maybe I can bribe her with tuna.”
Jacob looked at her. “I think she would betray me for tuna. Clever boy.”
I smiled. “Well maybe the first date could be at your place here and she can judge my character?”
Jacob snorted. “You sound like you’re trying to appease my mom on date night.”
“…Judging what you’ve told me of your mom, I think appeasing your cat would be easier.”
He rolled his eyes. “That’s the truth, right there.”
I finished the pretzels. “So…?”
“You wanna come over Thursday to play video games? I bought brownie mix.”
“…Can we make weed brownies and play Mario stoned?” I dared to ask.
Jacob looked at me. “Dude that is a marvelous idea.” We fist bump. “We’re friends now.”
“I dig,” I said. My chest was hammering. My first college boyfriend? Maybe? Just maybe? Well, depends on if Madge likes me. She was cuter than I am, after all.

Captions are fictional.
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